3 Days Until Shatmas!!!

El is fully expecting The Shatner to be delivered under El's tree on Christmas morning... if not... well, El won't be held responsible.

El is mad and he's not going to take it anymore!

Ok, what brought El back? First, he thought his assistant was covering these blogging tasks, but apparently the assistant was AWOL. El will have to fire him should he ever find out where he is.

Next?? El found out this woman has a book deal! She's going to set the record straight! WELL!?! What about EL?? HMMMM??? Most people think El is merely some cute, preservative-laced cupcake that sits on the shelf, waiting for lax mothers to buy for their kids! Surely El has no life! No history! No, not El! El only does what his corporate sponsors say!

WRONG! Has O'Donnell been painted by the 20th Century's greatest artists?? No. Has El?? Hell yeah! El would link, but he's not used to this blogging thing... his assistant usually did it while El dictated from the other room. Scroll down... find the images yourself!

But back to El's point... has Christine run with the bulls along with Hemingway? El thinks not! Ok, El may not have either... there was a lot of liquor that night and El just remembers that Ernie strapped him into some white ensemble and told him to run. El also remembers large piles of bullshit, but El was used to that with Ernie...

El is guessing Chrissie can't touch any of the fabulosity that El has experienced. Sure, she was some head of some tea party thingie, but you know what? El's had tea with the Queen! Suck on that!! Yes, El's done many things Christiney!

Hey lady, you frustrated lady, cursing at your life
You're a discontented tea partier causing nothing but fake strife
I've no doubt you dream about the things you'll never do
But, I wish someone had talked to me
Like I wanna talk to you.....

Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere they could market me
I took the hand of a Susie Q and we made love in the aisle three
But I ran out of places and friendly faces because I had to be free
I've been to paradise but I've never been to me

Please lady, please lady, don't just walk away
'Cause I have this need to tell you why I'm all alone today
I can see so much of me in you, I can see the yearning in your eyes
But we don't want you to share a part of a weary heart that has lived million lies....

Oh, I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece while I've sipped champagne on a yacht
I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed 'em what I've got
I've been undressed by hungry kings and I've seen some things that a cupcake ain't supposed to see
I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me

...sorry... El digresses... El has to find a new assistant... and a book deal.

Remiss in Blogging

But what can El say?? There's been vacation... and socializing... and a small, personal crisis of the soul, but other than that, El is still here.

Don't remove your bookmark yet. El has more to show. El just doesn't know if it's fact or fiction.

The Horrors of the Autograph Show Circuit

El has been remiss in his blogging duties... that's because El has been forced to go out and prove his relevance in a 21 Century world. El, who once had the world wrapped around his finger. At what point does a supreme cupcake become his own being and stop being a hawker for his creator?? More on that in another post...

El spent this last weekend doing autograph shows. El will not be doing this again. El hopes he will not be doing this again. While El understands the public's desire for contact, their desire to bask in his El-ness, El finds the autograph show to be... what shall we say... less than befitting a cupcake of his stature... a cupcake of his level... a cupcake who has moved beyond mere cupcake status to international cult figure. El is iconic, not pathetic.

El was not meant to sit in a huge room with poor lighting... sitting at a cafeteria table on a folding chair. El would have thought that the backers of this event might have thought that putting a cupcake anywhere near a cafeteria table might elicit less than pleasant feelings in said cupcake...

Still... El did his job... El mingled with the masses. El signed, and signed, and signed, and signed... El posed for photos. El gave words of wisdom. El looked resplendent.... looked being the operative word. It's going to take weeks to get the damn fingerprints out of this icing...

Dear Paulina...

It has come to El's attention that you and he are in the same boat... once overwhelmingly famous, only to find out that now, we've been relegated to the D-List, but relegated by whom, Paulina?? Certainly not themselves. No, they know better. Once an iconic figure who socializes with kings, always an iconic figure who socializes with kings.

They will not be relegated to the D-List.

Or... if they must be, at they've got each other. El's in need of a project. Have your assistant call his...

El Snacktator 20th Century Muse: Ludwig Mies van der Rohe

El's been rearranging Snackhambra again and ran across one of his favorite pieces of furniture... his custom BarcELona chair. Yes, BarcELona... at least that's what Mies named it.

You see, El didn't only have an impact on painters. No, no one was or is immune to that squiggle... El's iconic embellishment. Not even Mies... student of "form follows function"... less is more... you get the idea.

Maybe it was a case of opposites attract, but no matter how different their approach, El being all about the more, Mies being all about the bare bones, stripped down glory, El and Mies were instantly the best of friends... And so Mies dared to adorn his beloved Barcelona chair with an unneeded, totally frivolous embellishment (although he tried to claim it was a headrest and therefore had function) and renamed it the "BarcELona Chair".

El always loved Mies for that. El also wanted solid gold legs, but Mies drew the line. It was chrome or nothing. Pffft. Oh well.

It's "Show a Zombie Some Luv!" Day!!!

As El saw mentioned over here:

It's Show a Zombie Some Luv Day... have you hugged your zombie today? Zombies, often maligned in the arts, are really sensitive, caring souls... or would be... you know, if they had a soul. Still, they want their attention, they want their props, and who are we to deny them?