May 27, 2011

dELan Brodytator

OK, El lied. El has not called it quits, he was just depressed. Certain despots have been giving all despots a bad name these days and El felt it was tarnishing his reputation.

Also, a few weeks ago, El was up for The Huffington Post's "7 Sites You Should Be Wasting Your Time On Right Now!" El was snubbed for cats and babies. Pffft. There was a day when people couldn't get enough of El, but El was suspecting that his time was past... he was becoming nothing more than a baked version of Norma Desmond.

El then realized his real and true Facebook friend, Dylan Brody, wrote for The Huffington Post. Hmm, Dylan is no despot, but rather, a regular (some would protest this) guy. What would life be like if El lived as a regular man, yet one who still receives the adulation of the masses?? El was intrigued. Not to mention the fact that Dylan has hair... El's always wanted hair, but hair and baked goods usually don't mix... but still... what would life be like?

El decided to go undercover as Dylan... an award winning playwright, humorist and thrice published author and a regular contributor to The Huffington Post. In recent years, he has emerged as a radio raconteur, whose witty and profound tales of his journey through life are unique, yet utterly recognizable to everyone, earning him a reputation as one of America’s fastest rising storytellers.

Well! Smell him! Never mind that El is the one and only snack cake dictator... But El digresses... Dylan it would be.

Although it was intriguing to have hair and eyebrows, El's not sure people bought it. El thinks he looks a bit more like Raymond Burr... and everyone knows Raymond Burr and his career are both dead. Still, it was fun being out there... taking environmental publicity shots that highlighted that hair... oh that hair...

One other thing about the hair though... El realized it's frickin' hot. Perhaps that's why he kept sweating... and El means nonstop brow and upper lip sweat. Dear. Lord. Or perhaps it was because El was performing on stage. Those lights are hot. Or perhaps that was just El doing Dylan a little too well.

Anyhow, El's got his mojo back... and his smooth pate.


Kathleen said...

I might die of shame if that bio was attached to my name

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

OK, El lied. El has not called it quits, he was just depressed.

I SO know the feeling!

...but hair and baked goods usually don't mix...

There's theory, and then there's reality...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

"7 Sites You Should Be Wasting Your Time On Right Now!"

I already AM!